Life as Usual

Ok so I know I haven't blogged in forever. Sorry about that. :) I think part of it is just that I am getting used to life here. Many of the things that happen during the day which I would have immediately typed out as a good story to share when I first arrived, now just are part of everyday life. I do have one story that I want to share with you all today though about a man that I met in Kroo Bay this week.

On Thursdays I go with Erin, on of the staff members who is a physical therapist, to Kroo Bay where we have been seeing different people who can benefit from Erin's expertise. Mostly we have been seeing people who have suffered from strokes or similar type things which cause them difficulty in using their arms/legs. There is not a whole lot we can do because we are in these peoples' "homes" which are usually just shacks made of sticks and so any sort of therapy equipment is pretty much out of the question. Erin has been helping them by showing them just some simple exercises they can do to help strengthen the weak muscles and stretch the ones that have tightened up from lack of use.

Yesterday we met a 20 year old boy sitting in the doorway to the one room house he shares with his mother, sister, and quite possibly several other relatives. We came to learn that several months ago during the height of the rainy season, he had an accident. For some reason he was running and slipped on a rock and landed on his back and ever since then he had not been able to move his legs. He had gone to the hospital but they had basically told him there wasn't anything they could do for him. So he has been confined to his house ever since where his sister does most everything for him, including dragging him to the doorway so that he can at least see his neighbors and not be completely isolated from his community.

Again we don't really have any kind of equipment and Erin is a therapist but not a medical doctor so while we haven't done any x-rays or anything, the logical conclusion is that he broke his back and has a spinal cord injury that has paralyzed his legs. After working with him for a little while we found out that as of right now he has zero function below the knee but that he did have some extremely minimal function in the muscles between his hip and his knees. If he was laying down, he could not move his legs at all but after I had helped him put his knees in the air with his feet on the ground he was able to squeeze a pillow that Erin had put between his knees. After that we helped him learn how to move himself from his pad on the floor to the doorway by himself by picking up his legs with his hands and pushing himself along the floor. We tried to encourage him to try to do as much as he could for himself and to continue the exercises Erin had given him until we came back in a few days to check on him.

This one encounter with this man has both troubled and encouraged me. I'll try to explain what I mean. Kroo Bay is a hard enough place to live. As I have been walking through it often, I guess I am no longer "shocked" at a lot of things but the reality of the hardship the people there endure is never weakened in my mind. As I was with this paralyzed man and even more as I kept thinking about him the rest of the day I was almost completely overcome with grief. The question in my mind was, "I mean seriously God, was he not suffering enough already that he had to become paralyzed too?" Yeah great timing too because that night we were doing a Bible study at Lighthouse that I had prepared from Romans 5:1-11 about rejoicing in our sufferings. Haha yeah God always has great timing huh.

Even through all the questioning and heart ache that I felt yesterday there was one thing that had happened that kept coming into my mind and I'm still trying to process it. Before we had left, we had knelt down to pray with him and while we were praying I grabbed his hand and he kept squeezing it so hard. When we stood up to leave I looked down at him as I shook his hand goodbye and he had the biggest grin on his face as he looked back up at me. At the time I was still kind of shell-shocked by the whole situation but as I thought about it later, that grin seemed so out of place to me. Here is this man who is in the midst of the kind of suffering I will probably never be able to relate to and yet he is smiling at me and thanking us for coming to see him.

After the Bible study at Lighthouse I was thinking about one of the other passages we read from Romans 8 that went along with our Romans 5 study.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ³⁶As it is written:
"For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."^{l]" style="line-height: 0.5em; ">[l]} ³⁷No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^{m]" style="line-height: 0.5em; ">[m]} neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Now I don't know if this guy was a believer or not. Most likely, he is Muslim as most people in that area are. He probably doesn't know this specific verse but the Truth that there is nothing in this world, no suffering or hardship that is able to separate us from the love of God is always constant whether we know it, believe it, or not. Yesterday, Erin, Jan, and myself were privileged to be vessels through which that ever-present love of God could be poured through in a real and tangible way. God most certainly does not need us to show His love but it only makes sense that if we as believers have the Spirit of God living inside of us that He would use us as vessels through which His love can be poured into the world around us.

I don't know why this 20 year old boy was smiling because His circumstances definitely did not warrant such a reaction. To be honest I think I have a great deal to learn from people like him as I am not sure I would react in the same way. All I can think of to explain it is that he felt that He was loved and cared for. He may not realize explicitly that it is his Heavenly Father that is the source of that love but I pray someday He will.

It has been experiences like this that have really begun to make me realize what true ministry or service really is. I even wrote several posts when I first got here about this same kind of thing I think but now I am beginning to know it better by experience. It is not merely about fixing problems or having the right "projects." It is about people with names, families, histories, passions, desires, hurts, sorrows, and joys. It is about being a vessel through which the love of God can be poured into their own lives so that they may know that they are loved and cared for and that through Christ there is nothing that can separate them from the love of God.

Haha ok I'm going to stop now cause this is really long. I have a lot more thoughts about this rolling around in my head but I'll leave it at that for now. Looking forward to seeing all of you soon!

Germans and Gangstas

Well first of all, I tried to post some pictures from our Banana Island retreat on here last night and after spending 30 minutes waiting for them to upload, it didn't work. So maybe I'll try again soon. We had a great time of rest and reflection and preparation for our last two months here for our Servant Team.

Ok so I don't have any meaningful stories or deep introspective thoughts to write on here today. But I do have a funny story to tell. The past few weeks or so I have started getting two new comments from people on the street almost as much as "White Boy!" For whatever reason, I have gotten, on many occasions, "Hey German Man!" Haha not sure where that comes from but evidently I look German...or maybe it's just that whole "All you white people look the same" thing. :) Now the second one is really funny to me. At least once a day, I walk past some group of boys and there is inevitably this funny change in their demeanors. They all seem to instantly get this nonchalant, "too cool for school" air about them. Usually one of them starts doing this sort of "thug walk" toward me. Then there always seems to be this sort of gravitational pull of one of his hands to the crotch of his jeans while the other is usually thrown up in some gesture and he yells (in his best American movie inspired accent), "Yo, what up gangsta!" I still laugh every time it happens! One time I actually turned around and in Krio said, "Mi noto gangsta." A girl standing nearby then asked with a look on her face that seemed both amused and confused at the same time, "If you're not a gangsta then why do you have those things in your ears?" All I could do was laugh. I have no good answer for that one. :)

Much love to you all!
Erik (aka the German Gangsta)

Oct 9 (Pole Dancing Grandmas)

Ok so I've already been on the internet for over an hour responding to emails and facebook messages and such so this is going to be a quick one but I have a story to share. :)

I've been spending more time in Kroo Bay the past two weeks with Jan and also with Erin one of the staff members here who is a physical therapist. The first time we went together we went to visit some different people in the area with various physical problems. To make the story short I will just talk about one of them. I'm not sure of the ladies name but we just called here Grandmama. When we came to the "house" (really just a one room shack made of sticks and a tin roof), this sauna like heat smacked me in the face as I walked in, making me struggle to breath. As my eyes adjusted to the dark I saw a feeble old lady laying in bed barely able to move. (At this point I had only been there about 15 seconds and I was already drenched with sweat). I think the story was that she had been in bed one day, as she was mostly bed-ridden already, and a box of something had fallen off a shelf at the foot of her bed and landed on her leg. I don't think it broke here leg but as she spent all of her time in bed because of the pain in her leg she had become completely bed ridden as her muscles atrophied. Erin then talked to her and asked her if we could try to help her walk outside. Me and Erin, one at the front and one at the back, helped her sit up, then stand up, and then take small shuffling steps to the door as she leaned on us, struggling with the effort. After we got her outside, for what was probably the first time in a while, we sat her down on a bench and Erin began to explain to her (well really Erin spoke Krio to her grandaughters who then translated it to Temne, the tribal language that Grandmama spoke) different excersizes that would help strengthen her muscles so that she would not have to be bedriden. We then asked if we could pray for her and after doing so told her that we would be back the next week to check on her.

So this past Thursday we went back to check on Grandmama and as we approached the house we saw the grandaughters and greeted them and the other 20 people who had congregated outside as happens when white people are around. :) Then as we tried to go inside the grandaughters were already helping Grandmama out of bed and helping her walk out of the door to sit on the bench. I was amazed at how much she had improved! And also at the love with which the grandaughters had helped their grandmama every day since we had first visited. Now where she was sitting was under a porch covered with a tin roof and support poles made of saplings. Erin was having her do some excersizes and at one point she had gotten her to stand up mostly by herself by grabbing the pole. I was so excited! As she was standing, Erin asked her if she could lift up one foot at a time in a marching motion.

Now, what happened next, for whatever reason, seemed really beautiful and yet humorous to me at the same time. Grandmama began lifting up one foot at a time and then for some reason decided to speed it up so that to me it looked like she was dancing. :) Now, however inappropriate or out of place the thought may have been, the first thing that popped into my head when she started this was "last week this grandmama was bed ridden and now she is pole dancing!" LOL I know that is wrong on so many different levels but I think maybe Jesus was laughing with me at the joy of seeing this grandmama dance.

After Grandmama had tired and was done with her excersizes, we again asked if we could pray with her and as she agreed we invited her grandaughters to join with us in a circle as we all began to pray in the Sierra Leonian style (which basically means everybody prays out loud and at the same time what is on their heart and in whatever language they happen to speak, which I have a feeling is a lot what heaven is going to be like). As had I finished praying but the others were not quite done, I looked up at Grandmama's face (I had knelt down in front of her to pray). Though I knew she did not understand most of the languages that had been spoken in prayer over her, I could see it in her face that she was overcome with love and emotion. Then was we all said "Amen" she reached up to her eyes to wipe away a tear...Or maybe it was just an eye booger but regardless I have no doubt that she felt loved.

More Pictures!!!!

Hey everybody, pictures are kind of a pain in the butt to upload here and it is easier to put them on Facebook so here is the public link to all of my Sierra Leone pictures on Facebook. Enjoy!!!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2124616&id=55003949&l=85e661055f

Sept 22 (Jesus knelt before me today, barefoot and haggard)

This is something I wrote last night after an experience I had with a man that afternoon. I know there are all kinds of issues with and opinions about giving to beggars that deal with enabling, dependency, substance abuse problems and all kinds of stuff. This has nothing to do with any of that. This is just my own confession of brokenness, for not only my failure to recognize my Lord in front of me, but choosing to ignore Him.


"Jesus knelt before me today, barefoot and haggard"

With belly full and satisfied
I sauntered down the steps.
Then on the street, who do I meet
But Jesus Christ Himself.

I'd passed Him once on the way in
And crossed to the other side.
Now as we meet, can't help but see
The suffering in His eyes.

What happened next, I did not expect
Or ever thought I'd see.
The King of Kings and Lord of Lords
Knelt down in front of me.

With head bowed low and hands outstretched
He humbly looked my way,
And what did I do? It's shameful but true.
I turned and walked away.

I did not think to see my Lord
Down on bended knee.
"Christ, be fair! I did not know!
Twas You knelt front of me."

But as these words come out my mouth
I hear my Lord's decree,
"What you've not done for the least of these
You have not done for Me."

Sept 20 (What I AM and am NOT)

First a little side note, anybody wanting to understand more about Kroo Bay check out this website. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/hi/picture_gallery/07/africa_sierra_leone_slum/html/1.stm

This week marked the one month anniversary of my arrival to Sierra Leone! In some ways it feels like time has just flown by and in other ways it feels like I have been here for so much longer than that. It seems that the longer I am here (and really just the more days that I am alive in general) the more I realize how much I have to learn. And the more I learn, the more I realize how much I don't know. :) Such is the nature of knowledge I guess. If I had to describe my time here so far with one word it would be "humbling." I have been realizing two things - that which I AM and that which I am NOT.

I have found out that I am not as strong, not as compassionate, not as loving, not as good a teacher, not as well read or educated, not as discerning (and a whole host of other things) as I thought. And if I stopped there that would make for a pretty depressing experience thus far but the good news is it doesn't stop there. In learning all those things I am realizing my weakness, and it is in my realization and acceptance of my weakness that I am made strong. I am made strong because of what I DO have as a follower of Christ. First and foremost, I have the Spirit of the Living God dwelling in me, the same Spirit which lived in Christ Himself and empowered Him to live in 100% complete dependence upon God to live and to work through Him. As a child of God, heir with Christ, beloved of the Father, if I allow His spirit within me to lead and guide me so that as Paul said "It is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me," then I can go forward in the full confidence that the power of His Spirit within me is more than sufficient to accomplish all that He has set before me. So really I guess I am realizing the power of the ONE thing that I DO have which by far trumps all my weaknesses and limitations, actually in fact it is only through me recognizing and accepting my weakness and limitations that the Spirit is then free to work in me.

My entire life I have always been a get 'er done kind of guy but God keeps telling me to be still, silent, and alone with Him, to stop running around trying to do so much and to learn to enjoy him. Then my "doing" becomes much more focused and has more purpose because it is a result of my "being." Yes there is so much to be done in the world and yes Christ has called each one of us to "go" in our own callings, in essence it looks like the "love your neighbor" part of the two greatest commandments. But while I have been here God has been teaching me about the greatest commandment "love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind." You see only if I am living in this first and greatest commandment can I live out the second one. As I learn to be silent, still, and alone with God, stripped of all support structures, masquerades, and pretenses, I am realizing the passion and the intensity with which my Abba Father loves and desires me. As I am overcome with the magnitude of His presence and love in me it is then and only then that I am capable of fulfilling the second greatest commandment. It is in this place as I stated earlier that my "doing" becomes a result of my "being."

Sept 13 (Diva men and tattoos)

This past Thursday, one of the men on staff here named Jan (he's German so it's pronounced Yan) asked me to go to Kroo Bay with him. We were going to drop off a med student from Oxford named Rachel at a clinic in the middle of the slum and then go to a couple of places in the area that Jan knew to get to know some of the people who live there and establish some relationships with them. Evidently he is already fairly well known by a lot of the people and we heard "Mr. Jan! Mr. Jan!" coming from all over as we walked. Everybody wanted to greet him. I do not think there is a way for me to give you an accurate understanding of what Kroo Bay is like. It is just not within my literary or vocabulary reach to do so, but suffice it to say that it is a place avoided by even most Freetown locals, most of whom would be considered poor themselves. It is a place of poverty, disease, hunger, and all sorts of suffering and evil, but while that is all true it is also a place where there is a great opportunity for the love of our Creator to be shown. For it is in the darkest places where even a little bit of light can make a huge difference.

Basicall, what Jan is doing in Kroo Bay right now is getting to know the people. I think so many times in my own life I get wrapped up in projects and "fixing" problems as the way to love my neighbor as Christ commanded. Now I am all for certain projects and social justice issues and such but it is so easy sometimes to de-humanize or de-personalize such things. I forget that within the "projects" are the prized creation of the Most High God, made in His image, and beloved by Him. It is when I begin to comprehend this Truth that places like Kroo Bay cease to exist in my mind as a problem that needs fixing but instead as a place filled with beloved children of my own Father, my brothers and sisters, each with a face, a name, a story, joys and sorrows, who long to be loved and accepted, and with whom God the Father is madly in love with.

Ok, so time for a story. One of the thins we did in Kroo Bay is to go to this place the residents called "Diva." One guy we talked to actually introduced himself to us as a "Diva Man" and I was really confused at first until he explained the meaning. I know, funny name in English, but in Krio it basically means "hang out spot." Diva is a lean to style structure with no walls, a tin roof, and bench style seats made of crude wood where people, mostly men and boys, hang out and smoke weed to pass the time. It was really funny to see the reaction of the guys to me and Jan walking into Diva amidst the pot smoke wafting through the air and then Jan asking if we could hang out with them. At first, they were suspicious of us, and I don't blame them. I doubt many white people come to hang out there much. Jan just told them we came to learn from them about life in Kroo Bay. Once they realized that Jan and I weren't there to really "do" anything but that we were really interested in hearing about their lives in Kroo Bay, both good and bad, they started to loosen up and talk and joke with us. They told us about their community soccer team and bragged about how two guys from Kroo Bay actually play on the national team. They pointed out the field that they play on but informed us that they were waiting until after the rainy season to play because the area floods so badly. Not only does their houses flood but with the water comes all the trash and filth from the city above so the entire area, soccer field, paths, houses, is covered with trash. They told us that the flooding is worse now because of a bridge the city built for a road through Kroo Bay is causing a buildup of rubbish and is not allowing the water to flow through but instead pushes it out of the banks and into the slum. They told us about trying to find work in the city but the scarcity of jobs which is why they sit around and smoke instead of working (granted there are probably a variety of reasons they do not work. some their own fault and some not but I am just repeating their words).

One of the cool parts about the whole thing was that they seemed thankful, though probably still skeptical, that we actually wanted to listen to their thoughts on life in Kroo Bay and that we honestly admitted that we did not understand and could not relate but wanted to learn from and listen to them.

At the end, several of them were asking about my tattoos and so Jan asked if they wanted to hear the story behind my tree tattoo. Stories and pictures are big in African culture so they were eager to hear. Jan read the story from Isaiah 11 that prophesies of the coming of Christ. "A shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse; from his roots a Branch will bear fruit...." I told Jan later that was not actually the original inspiration of the tatoo but that I really liked his interpretation of it. After that, they all asked to hear the story behind my other tattoo, as they could only see the part below my sleeve, but we had to get going so Jan said if they would like for us to come back we could tell them the story next time. They said we could come back Monday if we wanted to. Haha I think it is so interesting to see how God works sometimes. I never really imagined myself in a pot den in a slum in Freetown having a friend use my tattoos as a story board to tell of the love of Christ. Please pray for the people in Kroo Bay and especially for the "Diva men" that Gold would reveal Himself to them, that they may see and experience His love. For there is no place that His love cannot penetrate. Pray that I may listen to and obey the Spirit as He leads my interaction with these people.

I love you all!!!

Sep 9 (A Week in the Life)

So I just want to share some details about what I am actually doing here during the week. Monday-Wednesday we have Bible study/worhip as a community (all the WMF staff) at Cami's house from 9:00-10:30. Then we have a break, then lunch before Krio class at 1:30. On Tuesday's, however, the servant team (my team here for 4 months) meets from 11:00-12:00 because we are going through the book of Isaiah together. Mon-Wed after Krio we go directly to the building where we tutor the Lighthouse and Kroo Bay kids. Wed night there is an international Bible study which is made up of Christians from all over the world. I have met some of the most amazingly gracious and loving people there. Thursdays we take turns making lunch with Steph, our servant team coordinator, at her house. We spend several hours there eating and talking about life and our experiences here in Freetown. We also have book discussions on the several books we are reading as a group while we're here. We just finished Way of the Heart by Henri Nouwen, which I highly recommend. This week we are starting Rich Christians in an Age of Hunger which has definitely brought me both conviction and hope. After Steph's we go to Lighthouse which is the Bible study and worship time with the youth. Friday is our day off which I usually start with a run along the beach. Sat mornings we meet the youth at the beach to play ultimate frisbee and do some gymnastics. :) Sat afternoon is the Kroo Bay Good News Kids Club which I guess I would compare to a kind of VBS. We also do some basic medical care of cuts and wounds after Kids Club as infections can be extremely dangerous in the slum. Sundays we have been going to a different church each day, just trying to experience the culture and meet new people.

This past Monday we had a staff retreat up on a mountain called Lester Peak which overlooks Freetown. The view and the landscape were absolutely incredible! I took a lot of pictures so hopefully I will be able to post them soon...and Dad, I have kept up the family tradition of getting a good "handstand picture," though I think I may have freaked out my leaders/team members a little bit. They just don't get it I guess. :)

I guess that's all for now. Please keep praying for me that I may be able to be still, silent, listen well, and understand the voice of the Lord. I know I have so much more to learn.

Sep 1 & 3 (Crazy Pills, Backhandsprings, and Pillow Fights)

Sept 1 9:00 PM

So the malaria medication, Larium, that I am on here sucks. I'm going to switch to a different kind next week. Evidently one of it's side effects is that it can cause anxiety and depression. Ha, well I haven't really been depressed but this past week, since I took my last dose on Saturday, I have not felt like myself. I am usually a pretty easy going person but it seemed like the littlest and stupidest stuff would just really irritate me. It weirded me out. Anne, who's also on my servant team, as well as every person here that I have talked to that has taken the same medication said that they had to switch too because it made them depressed, irritable, and/or have anxiety attacks. Oh, it also gives you really crazy, vivid dreams so I haven't been sleeping well. LOL it's some crazy stuff evidently. The third week you are on it is supposed to be the worst and of course this is my third week. :) My symptoms haven't been too extreme, but I am definitely going to switch medications. Anyways, enough about that. :) Now I know I'm not crazy. I was just taking crazy pills!

Sept 3 9:00 AM

Ok I finally want to write about one of the best Saturday nights I've had in a long time. Last Saturday, we went over to our field director, Cami's, house. Once a week, she invites three boys, Mohamed, Remie, and Saidu, who live in Kroo Bay with one of the WMF staff members anmed Noah, to spend the night at her house to give him a break. Each has their own story but Noah has taken them in sort of as his own kids. Remie is my ADHD buddy that I tutor during the week and he and Saidu are both around 11 years old. Saidu is a small guy and loves to play the djembe (African drum) and he is really good at it! Mohamed is probably around 18 and is an extremely gifted student.

Saturday night me, Ben, Krysta, and Anne were at Cami's hanging out with the three boys. Two older boys, David and Alimomie were also there. We ate and talked and laughed. Saidu was trying to teach us how to play the djembe and laughing when the four whities couldn't stay in rythym. Then Cami pulls out this old, twin size spring mattress and asks if I want to teach them some gymnastics! We started with some basics, backbends walking their hands down the wall, backbends onto the mattress, and kickovers off the wall. They were having a blast! Even the older guys joined in. Cami just told me to keep in mind that we don't have any good medical care here. :) But by the end of the night almost everybody was doing backhandsprings on the mattress with a spot and Remie and Alimomie can practically do it by themselves!

Half way through "gymnastics class" Cami grabbed Saidu and interrupted with an impromptu tickle fight which manifested into a pillow fight which turned into an all out pillow battle royale. It was hilarious! Then half way through I had to step outside because I had this sort of epiphany that made me almost start to cry. This was one of the most genuine and beautiful pictures of ministry I had ever seen. I wonder how many times before WMF had taken them in that someone had taken the time to love on them through an impromptu tickle fight, pillow war, or even a sort of gym class. I won't give you a background on the boys specifically to respect their privacy but suffice it to say that each has their own story of hardship and extreme physical need. There are so many people out there in need of food, medical care, and a myriad of other needs and of course we can show the love of Christ through meeting those physical needs, but I wonder to what power that love is intensified when we make a conscious decision to not merely provide for them but to share life with them as part of a community. To eat together, laugh together, play together, and also to cry together, to mourn and suffer together. "Rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep." Romans 12:15

I think I am beginning to understand what Jesus said when he was questioned as to why he was eating and hanging out with the "sinners." "But go and learn what this means, 'I desire compassion and not sacrifice'." One of the concrete ways Jesus lived out this compassion was to eat with them, to hang out with them, to share life with them as part of their community. How much easier it is sometimes to give "sacrifices," money or charity or any number of good things, than it is to BE a living sacrifice in love, friendship, and community whether through a conversation, sharing a meal, celebrating together, grieving together, or maybe even a pillow fight. This is where the true nature of compassion seems to be made manifest.

PICTURES!!!!!!

Ben sitting in his favorite spot outside our room

Normal Freetown homes

This is the Freemans house. Mine and Ben's room is through the gate on the left.

Some Sierra Leonians playing on the beach

Just thought this was a cool picture. I had to climb up a shady looking ladder

that looked like it was made out of driftwood and onto the roof of an unfinished

building to get it but it was worth it! :)

Juggling at our home during down time :)

My servant team

The view from the school where we go to Krio lessons

Aberdeen Beach

Pretty much every road in Freetown when it rains. :)

Aug 26 (Finally A Description!)

Ok, so we have some free time before our Krio lesson today so I am going to attempt to describe my life and surroundings here. I'll start with where I live.

Me and Ben stay in a one room building, a little bigger than the walk in closet I used to sleep in at the Locust St. house. It is part of a small compound in town that belongs to Mr. and Mrs. Freeman, an older couple probably in ther 60s. Mr. Freeman is funny. He likes to have really random conversations in broken English and many times will forget most of what was said by the next day. Mrs. Freeman is a mother and caretaker of the highest caliber. She runs the compound. She also cooks authentic Sierra Leonian food for us every night, probably one of the best cooks in Freetown! Typical food is rice with some sort of "sauce" on top. The most common are cassava leaf, potato leaf, palm oil stew, ground nut (peanut) stew. I will have to take some pictures of the food later so you can see it. I am pretty sure I am losing weight but it is not because I am ever hungry, probably because we walk everywhere!

We sleep on foam matresses on a bunk bed that wobbles so much I made Ben sleep on top for fear that if I was on top I might break it and crush him during the night. We sleep with only a sheet over the matress and no covers and still probably lost a pound or so of sweat in the night. About 1/3 of the time we have electricity so when we are able to go to sleep with the fan on it is a welcome blessing. :) There is a bathroom with a real toilet which is awesome! We have to flush it by pouring water from a bucket into the bowl. We also have a shower which I am pretty sure if I had room that I could run under it without getting wet as it is really more of a fast drip than a shower. Hot water is definitely non-existent. We are just happy when we have water which is about 60% of the time. The first few showers literally took my breath away it was so cold but now one of the highlights of my day is a cold shower before bed. :)

The town itself is crazy and colorful. Motorcycle taxis zoom in and out of beat up taxi cars, UN and NGO cars, and potapotas (a mini van taxi that holds about 20 people, African style of course) in a seeming free for all that while it may have rules, they are definitely not any that I learned in Drivers Ed. :) Here pedestrians definitely do not have the right of way. Walking anywhere is like one big game of Frogger! Also, everywhere you look there are people carrying things on their heads, selling anything from toothpaste, watches, sunglasses, matches, candy, food, and underwear. (Don't worry mom I haven't had to buy any underwear off the street yet.)

Most of the houses are made of cement brick with corrugated tin roofs. There is trash everywhere. I think I have only seen maybe 3 trash cans in the city. There are animals everywhere! Stray dogs, goats, chickens all over the place! Even though up close everything looks very rundown and dirty, the landscape on which it is built is absolutely incredible, mountains that stop at the ocean and rivers with cascading waterfalls, palm trees and green everywhere. It seems to be a city of contradictions both ugly and beautiful.

Oh one more thing, I guess a lot of clothes they get here are surplus that wasn't able to be sold in the US or other countries and so some of the T-shirts people wear here are downright hilarious. My favorite so far was on that Anne saw a little old lady wearing that sad "I fart on the school bus." Haha we definitely find humor in some of the most unexpected places here! :)

Aug 25 (Green Eggs and Ham)

It has been 9 days since I arrived and I think that I am just now beginning to get used to my new life here. I can get around mostly on my own and this week we actually have somewhat of a schedule. One of my main responsibilities here will be to tutor some of the Lighthouse and Kroo Bay kids. School doesn't start for another couple of weeks here so we have been playing games or reading with them. The Lighthouse boys are older (15-22) but reading and writing in English is a struggle for them. I am amazed and humbled at these boys desire to learn.

The first day (Monday/yesterday), my friend Alimome, who is 22, asked if I would read with him and he pulled out this book that looks like it had washed up on the beach with all the other trash. When I opened it I almost laughed out loud! It was a book published in the 1920's in England and the title was something about how to make a happy home for the newly married or those about to get married. :) We do have other books for the boys to read but he wanted to read that one because he had borrowed it from a friend and was the only English (albeit British English) that he had. We slugged through words like ne'er, o'er, and efface for about an hour. He would ask me the meaning of some words that I didn't even know myself. Life is just funny sometimes. :)

Today I began to teach some of them how to juggle, had a business consultation/conversation with one of the boys name David who is a tailor by trade, and read Dr. Suess's Green Eggs and Ham with my friend Morris who is probably around 18. Ha, I'm sure that was a funny sight but these boys are so eager to learn they want to read anything and everything. I am really excited about continuing to get to know these kids and working with them.

Once school starts some Kroo Bay kids will also start coming who are younger. Yesterday, Steph kind of chuckled and said I was already assigned an 11 year old boy named Remi who apparantly has severe ADD or ADHD. Haha that is going to be an experience for sure! It's going to take a lot of prayer and creativity to work through ADD, a foreign language, and culture barriers. :) I'm excited about the challenge though.

August 22 (Two days in a row at the beach)

Fridays (yesterday) are ourday off during the week. Anne, Krysta, Ben, and myself ended up exploring all over. We made it to the beach about 4.5 miles away. Quick recap, the landscape was beautiful but the beach was dirty as all the rain has washed the city trash into the ocean. It should clear up as soon as the rain stops. We saw a group of fisherman pulling a huge net into the shore with all kinds of fish in it. A group of Sierra Leonians were standing standing around a sea turtle that was flipped on its back. I think they were trying to help it but they all seemed scared of it because when they would try to flip it over they would scream and jump away when it started flapping its flippers. I found two coconut trees to string up my hammock which was amazing! Part way through hanging on the beach a man with white warrior paint all overs his body chose us as his next audience for his "performance" which turned out to be kind of disturbing. He said that he wanted to show us a trick and when we agreed, proceeded to fill a huge bowl with sand and then EAT five or six double handfuls of it!!! I didn't want to watch but kept thinking that maybe this was just an intro to the real trick but after he finished he just thanked us and walked away. After talking to our friends here, we were happy to be reassured that is definitely not considered normal here. :) Though it makes for an interesting story for sure!

This morning my new friend Alimome (Ali-mommy) from Lighthouse asked if I wanted to jog with him. Many of the boys from Lighthouse go to the beach on Saturday mornings with Chris, one of the staff, to play ultimate frisbee. Chris has been teaching them how to play for about a year now. Alimome decided that it would be a good idea for me and him to run the four and something miles to the beach, which would not have been bad except that he is substantially faster than me. I could tell he was slowing down for my sake and I did have to walk once for a minute or two and yet we still finished the entire distance in about 30 minutes! Considering I haven't run in months and the fact that everything here is either up or down a hill, I'm just glad that I made it without passing out. And of course while I'm resting at the beach, Alimome decides to take off on his own for another 30-45 minute run.

After spending the day on the beach with the boys, we went to the Kroo Bay kids club, which is another one of the things WMF does here. Kroo Bay is an extremely poor slum next to the water in Freetown. Noah, a staff member for WMF and local Sierra Leonian has been working with the kids for over 10 years. 200-300 kids come every Saturday to sing and dance and be taught the Word. Later Noah and some of the Lighthouse boys help clean and bandage the kids cuts and wounds in order to prevent infection, which can be so dangerous in the slums. I am excited to get to know some of the kids in the weeks to come.

***Hopefully pictures will be coming in the next week or so!!!

August 20 (Lighthouse)

10:00 PM

We got to go to "Lighthouse" tonight which is one of the main things WMF is involved with here. Basically they have worked with the same kids for many years helping them go to school and/or get a job and provide an overall support structure for them. Some have parents, some don't, some have a place to sleep, and others sometimes sleep on the streets. Every Thursday night they all meet together to study the Word, pray, and worship. Everything is a mixture of Krio and English so as of right now I only pick up part of what is being said. What I can see though is the great amount of love within that group. The kids there (about 20 of them from 15-22) seem to have a genuine thirst for the Truth of the scriptures. I have a feeling I will learn much more from them than they ever do from me.

11:00 PM

I can't sleep right now because my adrenalin is running right now. I was just about to go to sleep when our fan turned off. We usually only have electricity for a few hours a day so it is a luxury if the fan is on when we go to sleep (It's extremely hot and humid btw). Well as I looked toward the fan I saw a little flicker of light which turned into a flame which caused first me and then Ben to jump out of our beds. Our power outlet was on fire! I knew I couldn't put it out with water and of course a fire extinguisher is out of the question here so my reaction is to start blowing on it as hard as I can. I swear it was like one of those trick birthday candles. Every time I would blow it out it would wait a second before flaming back up. I then grabbed my towl in order to suffocate it, in the back of my mind hoping that it was not still wet enough that it would somehow be able to transfer any electrical current to me. Thankfully, it worked and I was able to avoid a painful recharge. :) We did buy a new power strip and everything is good to go now. First week and already floods and fires! Haha it's an adventure for sure, but God is good and is in control. Plus I'm getting some great material for some new stories! :)

August 19 (Cups)

So to those of you who I am sure are wondering about actual physical characteristics of where I am, I am not ingoring your interest, it is just taking me a while to be able to take it all in and to try to somehow put it into words. I have been taking lots of pictures but I am still trying to figure out how to post them on here. Most of the computers at the internet cafes are really old and I'm not sure if they will even do it, but I may be able to post pictures sporadically using my leader, Steph's, computer. I will try to do it soon I promise!

Our field director, Cami, gave us a visual this morning of a cup, sitting in a bowl, sitting on a plate. Basically we are the cup and as the Father fills us up we overflow into our close community which in turns overflows into those around us and those our community is trying to reach. There are all kinds of analogies and comparisons which can be gleaned from this visual but I particularly can relate to something that one of the staff members, Karolina, said. I'll put it in my own words. As the cup, it seems that so many times instead of being focused on the Father so that he may fill me, I instead find myself looking around and comparing myself to all the other cups. Is their cup bigger or smaller, dirtier or cleaner, more ornate or plane and ordinary? This comes from being prideful and/or insecurities in ourselves that sause us to run in the wrong race, a race against each other rather than towards the Father. (And yes I realize that I switched analogies mid-point) When we are focused on the other cups, we are not being filled as we should by the Father and are therefore not overflowing life into our community and those we are trying to reach.

Aug 18 (Hey White Boy!)

Aug 18 8:00 PM

It has been an eventful day. We had prayer meeting at 9:00 AM but the two girl servant team members, Anne and Krysta, did not make it because the river behind where they are staying flooded their house. There was really heavy rain (as it is the rainy season) and they woke up at 2 AM to three feet of water in their bedroom. The crazy thing was the girls just kind of rolled with the whole thing and seemed barely phased by the whole ordeal as far as being in good spirits. We definitely have a very chill servant team with the two girls, Ben, and myself. That is a huge blessing as I don't do well with high stress or high maintenance people. :)

I am finally learning my way around the city. It is an incredible place. Me and Ben have actually picked up directions pretty quickly and have been exploring on our own. At first, our leader Stephanie was a little nervous to let us venture out so quickly but I think we've proven ourselves now so she feels comfortable with us on our own. It's quite humorous when I go walking about because of all the attention I get. I often get called "Hey white boy!" to which I've learned to jokingly respond "Hey black boy!" Ha! Which is not offensive here btw. :) Many people have commented that they like my "stamps" referring to my tattoos. On a couple of occasions it has been really funny as a younger guy would jokingly call me out or challenge me in some sort of fight or physical contest in order to show out for his friends. One guy actually yelled about 30 yards down a hill at me, "Hey big guy! You see me!?" as he flexed and pounded his chest. I of course busted out laughing, to which he started grinning and all those around to see the whole macho display were greatly amused.

Here is a prayer that we all prayed together this morning that I have heard before and hope to make my life prayer. It is from St. Francis of Assissi and I think it describes so well how we are to live out this seemingly backwards kingdom of Heaven here on earth.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred, may I bring love
Where there is wrong - forgiveness
Where there is discord - harmony
Where there is error - truth

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is doubt, may I bring faith
Where there is despair - hope
Where there is shadow - light
Where there is sadness - joy

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive
and in forgiving that we are pardoned
and in dying that we awake
to eternal life forever and ever. Amen.

Aug 17 (New in Town)

Aug 17 8:00 PM

As has been my experience with African airports, it was crazy. 15 people trying to help me find a taxi or carry my bags to try to get a tip. It always seems like there are 10 people trying to do one person's job. Haha even loading the bags into the van took forever because there were more people trying to load the bags than there were actual bags. It was an interesting experience for sure but I think having been in Kenya before and maybe just being older and having experienced more since then has helped de-intensify the culture shock at least somewhat.

I have, however, experienced some of the "What the heck am I doing here" phase that tends to happen the first little bit that I go somewhere new. I think the differentness of everything, feeling like an outsider, being unsure about what to say or how to act, and especially the very daunting task ahead of me of ministering to a people that right now I feel like I cannot relate to at all. The kind of thoughts running through my mind are like "how can I make a difference in peoples' lives when we can only barely understand each other when we speak?" But in all that, I have to keep reminding myself that it is not my responsibility to change a person's heart. It is only my responsibility to obey in love, and love can transcend all language or cultural barriers. God is the one who changes hearts.

There seems to be a pride issue with those thoughts that creep in my head. It's almost a discouragement based on a fear of failure before I even begin my work. "Am I doing the right thing and am I going to be able to make a difference, to make an impact?" I think these are the wrong questions because they stem from my own pride of wanting to be able to say that I "accomplished" something. I think they should instead be something like "Am I acting in loving obedience to the Father and am I actively seeking to pass on his love to others around me?" It's funny, that sounds a lot like "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and sould and mind. And love your neighbor as yourself." I mean Christ did say these are the two greatest commandments. I sometimes take the complicated route through the pride and selfishness issues but I always end up at these two commandments. The good news is that the journey seems to be getting shorter. :) "Succeeding" in these two commandments is so much more important than any other sort of measurable success as we might think of it. The rest is God's responsibility. It is not achieving results that must be my motivation but it is obedience and love, first for my Father and then my neighbor.

AUG 15 (In the airport)

Ok so I don't have access to a computer every day so I have been keeping journal entries so that I can remember all the crazy stories and stuff that is going on. I will write the date above the post so that you will be able to at least follow my timeline a little bit. I am not going to post it all because I don't want you to have to read a book or anything but I do want to give you all as many details about my experience as possible. I am going to type really fast so please excuse any typos.

Aug 15 11:20 AM

I think I have decided that I am now jealous of the disciples for a different reason than ever before. I feel that I can relate to them in a sense because it is also the call of God in my life which has prompted me to embark on this current journey to Sierra Leone. Like the disciples I have lefts behind a job, family, and friends. The part that I am jealous of is that in their case the calling prompted an immediate departure rather than some predetermined date months in the future so that there is time for goodbye letters, going away parties, and hyouse visits the week before leaving to make sure everybody gets their hug. I have honestly been amazed at the outpouring of love and support that I have received, and I especially have appreciated how all my students have shown me so much love. Two sisters even came to see me off at the airport and I almost cried it touched me so much. All that being said, all the extra time to think about leaving and saying goodbye just makes leaving that much harder. I guess I wouldn't want it to be any different. Maybe its just the more you love and are loved the harder it is to leave. I think the only reason I can do it is because I am following an even greater love, the One who IS Love.

.................I know this entry is still while I was in the airport in LR but more to come about Sierra Leone soon I promise!

Ready to Leave

Well I think I am finally packed and ready to go. I find it amazing that I was able to fit everything that I needed to live for 4 months in two suitcases (well actually I fit it into one but it was too heavy to meet the airline restrictions). I have been looking forward to this day for so long now, it seems almost surreal now that it is almost here. I want to say thank you so much to all of you who have supported me financially and especially through prayer as I begin this journey.

"The kingdom of heaven is at hand"Christ kept proclaiming while he was on earth. The people had a hard time understanding what he meant because the kingdom that he spoke of was completely backwards from any kingdom they had ever seen. In this kingdom those who are last are first, those who give up their life save it, those who are poor are blessed. Strength and power are not honored but instead humbleness, service, and child-likeness are commendable attributes. It is a place where the poor, dirty, uneducated, and unclean can become heirs with Christ to the kingdom of God. Some of the first of these were called the apostles. :) It is a kingdom in which all are invited to the party. Rich and poor, clean and unclean, "good" and "bad", Jewish and Gentile, socially refined and socially outcast, are all invited to join the celebration of our Lord. Any kingdom in which it's own ruler compares it to a mustard seed or yeast spreading through dough is one strange kingdom indeed. Sounds kind of small and subversive, based on principles very different from the usual "how to establish a kingdom" manual that Attila the Hun, Alexander the Great, Napoleon Bonapart, and many others seem to have followed. Instead it is a kingdom made up the "the least of these."

"I know men and I tell you that Jesus Christ is no mere man. Between Him and every other person in the world there is no possible term of comparison. Alexander, Caesar, Charlemagne, and I have founded empires. But on what did we rest the creation of our genius? Upon force. Jesus Christ founded His empire upon love; and at this hour millions of men would die for Him."
- Napoleon Bonapart

I love how Mother Theresa talks about the "smallness" of the kingdom in words that we can live by day to day. In her simple wisdom she said, "We can do no great things, only small things with great love." These words seem kind of backward in a society where success is usually measured in percentages,numbers, size, or scope. I am beginning to learn that God does not call me to produce tangible results as we might measure them, but he does call me to love and to serve. If I do that, all the "results" tend to take care of themselves. But of course there is always that human pride that seems to creep up, wanting to do something "big" to "change the world" as so many idealistic youth have touted. It almost sounds like were trying to redeem mankind, which is funny cause I think that's already taken care of. :) Granted, if we all fully lived out the love of Christ the world would surely change but it is not up to me to change it, it is only up to me to obey in love. As you pray for me please pray that I would be able to resist the temptation to be merely a social activist trying to accomplish some sort of measurable success but instead that I would do every small thing, every tiny act of service, with great love. That I may be a reflection of that seemingly backwards but so very beautiful kingdom of heaven.

One last special thanks to all of my dear friends who have spent late nights or long lunch breaks talking and praying as we pondered together so many questions in our search to know God and his purpose for life. I think we came up with more questions than answers but I think we're farther along than when we started. I look forward to renewed conversations when I get back.